Grandma Wasden

My Grandma Wasden passed away in February of 2000. It took me a long time to grieve her loss, I was pregnant with C at the time and really excited that all 4 of my grandparents were still alive to greet my first child (Mike only had one grandma alive at that point.) However, Grandma got very sick and went to heaven before C came. I was not angry with her, because I knew she was aware of my child and there to help us both through the delivery.

As I sit today thinking about her I realized that it is her birthday. She would be 86. I am sure she is happy and perfect in heaven, but I still miss her!

 I am so grateful for her presence around me so often. After I took the time to grieve a few years ago I started to feel her presence around me more often. I think I thought if I held out on the grieving I would not feel the loss in my life. Funny how that did not work. In fact, I think it was the opposite. After I took the time and pain to acknowledge the loss I was blessed with the comfort of feeling her love for me, and knowing she is there with me when times get hard.

On thegiftofgivinglife.com today one of the bloggers talks about her family (birth) history. She has taken the time to go through the family histories she has to glean as much about her ancestors' birth experiences as possible. I wish now that I had some of those experiences from Grandma. She was a nurse, so I think if I had asked I might have heard some choice stories. Her mother was a midwife in Heber, Utah and I'm sure the stories she could have told were exceptional.

 Anyway, the whole point of this post is that I am grateful for my heritage. For a legacy of women who have stood the test of time and faith to help me reach this point. I am grateful to know that they are holding the hand of my new little one and will surround us with love as we go through the fire that is the birthing process. I am so grateful for their courage that buoys me up.

The picture is of a piece I created 2 years ago at SUU. I don't remember the whole point behind the assignment but the piece is titled "Goddess of my Heritage." It was huge part of my grieving process, I am so thankful that I was able to spend so much time visiting my grandmother's image. It really helped me to renew the bond that I had let slip, to let go of the pain and to draw strength from the knowledge that she is still aware of me and rooting for my welfare.

The photo I used did not have the braids or the hat, those were my representations of her Swedish roots, but I felt like they added just the right touch to keep perspective on the fact that we are a sum of the heritage that comes before us. We can fight it all we want, but we are tied to those who paved the way.

I am so grateful for my heritage. I am truly blessed to have grown-up with all of my grandparents surrounding me with love and support!

Happy Birthday Grandma! Thanks for being a part of my heritage!